The Joy of Self Discovery

On the day I started this post a dear young woman in my life turned 30.

30 to me is the "Age of Credibility." Someone said this to me on the day I turned 30, The Age of Credibility.  Being that my most favorite of Don Miguel Ruiz's Four Agreements is Be Impeccable With Your Word this idea of Credibility resonated with me.  I said this to her and I was immediately taken through a thought provoking moment.

THE JOY OF SELF DISCOVERY

I am 39 years old I've been thinking so much about "AGES," years, decades and what they mean in the realm of this thing called life.  I've chosen to venture into a journey of self discovery and am attempting to figure out what, if anything, it means.   

Yes, I'm on a quest of self discovery but more importantly I'm on a quest to share.  Creating Community is something I value, one of my priorities.  The more I explore and get to know me the more I see that my passion lies in Creating Connection.  Last month I was researching Italia's Ponte Vecchio in Firenze and it brought me to tears, tears of joy. (Yes, I find myself tearing often...) See, my last name is APonte. My last name means A Bridge.  I spent several years bringing and overseeing youth activities at the George Washington High School Campus in Washington Heights.  I would always say, "We are Building Bridges at George Washington!"  When I said this to people and even to myself I was not owning the fact that I WAS instrumental in the building of the bridges.  I thought it was a witty and coy way to tie in the fact that the George Washington Bridge was the background landscape for the High School Campus.  I worked for an organization and I didn't consider myself an individual making a difference. I was the organization I was representing.  It truly wasn't until I sat down and saw the picture of Ponte Vecchio and was writing down the history and meaning of the bridge that I realized in this lifetime I was born to be A Bridge, A Bridge, Creating Connections.

What a blessing. 

What has your journey of self discovery taught you?  What joys or sorrows has it brought to your awareness?

Thank you for allowing me to share my thoughts and life experiences with you.  I look forward to hearing your thoughts and life experiences.

Namaste.

Sharing is caring.

Respectfully & Sincerely yours,

JeWeLs

Love + Motherhood= Magic

"To a child’s ear, “mother” is magic in any language." 

- Arlene Benedict

Last night I saw this on my friend's social networking homepage.  I was about to go to bed. It was way past my sleep time and I could barely keep my eyes open but when I saw this it just conjured up all these amazing moments I have been able to experience for the past three years, seven months and eight days.  "Mother" to a child is magic and the magic my child has brought to my world is immeasurable, inexplicable, there are no words in any language that could ever encompass the true experience.  His adoration for me is only rivaled by his desire to always see me smiling.  Even when he is "misbehaving" his goal is to make me laugh or smile.  

Tonight I was blessed with the opportunity to experience and be part of The Focusing Institute's Holiday Gathering and First Annual Fundraiser (Remember my Road To Calm Retreat? I wrote about it on 10.4.12, JeWeLs Organically: Part of my Road to Calm).  What a moving and inspired experience. I got to meet and speak with several amazing spirits.  My sister friend Asata and my girl Julissa were both present and we briefly touched on incorporating our FOCUSING during our interaction with our children.  What an enlightened and love filled world I get to enjoy every day.  Both of my sisters are Mom's and although we had an amazing, "aha moment" filled evening we could not wait to get back to our little ones.

I was on my way to pick up my little joy, I called him after listening to his voicemail asking me to come get him and he asked if I had fun. I told him it was great and that I would be there to get him soon. He said, "Thank you mom, I had fun with Grandma and Grandpa but I really, really missed you."  I'm so blessed.  Being Max's Mom is Magic.  I've had the awareness of magic in my heart all of my life and now I get to hold magic in my arms.

NAMASTE!

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Respectfully & Sincerely yours,

JeWeLs

What I focus on Expands

I am of the school of thought that what I focus on expands.  I earnestly believe that. I own it as on of my mantras yet there are times when I choose to focus on sadness or frustration or rejection. When I realize what I am doing I breathe and change my focus.

Now I don't know if this happens to you, but I often send messages to folks who "Pop Into My Mind," or send a thought I am looking to discuss and the message just disappears into the ether, I don't hear back from anyone. Often I don't ever get a response, ever. Many times, if the person is a special part of my heart, I don't pay attention to the lack of response and if they "Pop Into My Mind," again, I send another message. I choose to think they are just too busy and KNOW that I KNOW they received the message and things are moving as per the norm.  

The situation today is, sometimes I take it personal. I know it isn't personal. 
If you are familiar with Don Miguel's "The Four Agreements," you are familiar with Agreement Number Two: 

Don’t Take Anything Personally

Nothing others do is because of you. 

What others say and do is a projection          of their own reality, their own dream.        When you are immune to the opinions         and actions of others, you won’t be the     victim of needless suffering.

I have noticed I take it even more personal when it is someone who I have never met. I think the person just doesn't want to be bothered but more than that I think, "Who the Heck do they think they are? They're too busy to respond to something that is important?" When I sit down, breathe and think, who is it important to? Do I always respond immediately? Is it really that serious? I say to myself, "Julie, go live. Be Love and trust that everything is fine, everything happens when it's suppose to happen and it is all good."  I literally have that conversation with myself sometimes and it works.  I remind myself it isn't personal and everyone has many things going on in their lives, we all do.  I had to sit down and remind myself today because I sent out two messages about two weeks ago and neither individual has responded. I'm pretty surprised and today I received a message from a third party and when I saw the other names on the recipient line I thought, "Hmmm, let's see if we all get a response now!"  As I sit to share this with you all I think, what a waste of energy. What I can be grateful for in this circumstance is that I have the "Don't Take Anything Personal" perspective and practice happening and I am reminded to BeLove.

Happy Tuesday my friends.

Go out there and BeLove!

If someone sent you a message or called you and you have yet to respond, take a moment today and send them a message, if I am that person, don't send me a text cause I have not had text capabilities on my cell phone ever since July 16, 2010 (That's my Best Friend's and A Very Special Sister Friend's Birthday-that's why I remember).

Check out the The Four Agreements, by Don Miguel Ruiz, pick it for yourself or for a friend, it makes a great, "Just thinking of you," gift.

Namaste.

Sharing is caring.

Respectfully & Sincerely yours,

JeWeLs

Affirmations

I have two perpetual calendars by Dr. Wayne W.Dyer.  One calendar lives in my closet and the other on the shelf above my dish rack.  One is small and just has the words to inspire and the other is a bit bigger and also has beautiful artwork to complement the words.

I read each of them every day. 

Today the one in the kitchen says: 

Be gentle and forgiving with yourself, 

abandon any and all shame, 

and refuse to engage in any self-repudiation.

I love this message because it's one that I have to remind myself of often.  It's easy and common for me to remind my beloveds to do this for themselves but when it comes to me for me, it's been a tad bit tricky.  If you follow me on twitter, 

@JeWeLs_MaX you have read where I write, "Loving to the Max and living moment by moment. Getting out of my own way has not been easy, here I go..."

Just the fact I am telling myself I am in my own way is really not being gentle with myself.  I have decided, if I truly want to be at peace, fulfilled, loving and living my best life, then I must truly be nurturing to myself. I must have compassion for myself. It's a practice I must incorporate into my lifestyle.

I can easily tell you three conversations I had this week with folks stressing to them how they need to be compassionate and kind with themselves.  For me it's so natural to understand and KNOW THEY do, now it's time for me to KNOW I do as well.

 
By the time I post this it will be December 3, 2012 (12.3.12) so I will share what my calendar says for 12/3:

In an infinite Universe,  

there's no time restriction on 
how many lifetimes you get.

Wow, these are some very powerful words and the art has some butterflies. The transitions that butterflies go through to become butterflies would encompass a few of the lifetimes we live in the "infinite Universe." Wow. I think I am going to sit with these words for the night and hope they inspire you as they do me.

Remember to stand in Gratitude, it's the ONLY Attitude.

BeLove!

Namaste!

Sharing is caring.

Respectfully & Sincerely yours,

JeWeLs

Girly Girl?!?

There have been times that I wished I was a "girly girl."  Those times have been rare and far between but they existed.

I am one of five sisters and I come from a family with much more women than men yet the "girly girl" vibe was never very prevalent in my household.  I think the first "girly girl" I remember is my cousin who just turned thirty this year and got engaged and after her, my cousin whose little girl is now number one "girly girl."  That's it. Those are the two I can think of.  Before my lovely ladies go into a tail spin, I am not saying that we are not ladylike or that we don't have girlish qualities, what I am referring to is "girly girl." I know my articulation skills are lacking in this instance but it's not something clearly definable  with words, it's more like a vibe, like a feeling, like the Humming in Sade's songs.  If you aren't sure if you are a "girly girl" or not stop reading, go to mirror and look at yourself in the eyes, look, look intently and deeply, if you have to think about for more than a moment you are not a "girly girl."

My mother she's a strong, nurturing, focused mother and wife. My grandmother was basically the same, strong, nurturing, focused mother, grandmother and wife.  There wasn't any time or desire (I think, there may have been some desire but not so much, not any that they ever cared to engage or explore) to stop and be "girly."  They don't seek pampering or weekly trips to the salon.  Still to this day if I try to give either of them a shoulder massage they just say, "no!" They do not look to be pampered or be dainty in any way.  I like that about them.  I like that about me, that's why I'm ok with just being Jewels, the Jewels that I am.

Although I am not a "girly girl," I am a fierce and often graceful woman.  I am passionate and nurturing. I am loving, creative and kind, I just don't need to get a manicure or pedicure every week anymore.  From the time I was 19 to the time I was about uh, let's see 24 perhaps, I would get a mani/pedi every two weeks. My nails were wrapped in acrylic and they were each about 1 inch long.  I would get airbrush on my nails, there were times I had my nails pierced, it was madness I tell you.  I spent way too much time and money on that and at this junction I don't regret it. For a moment I thought about it and wished I'd been more prudent with my time and my cash, I should have put away those 35 dollars every two weeks and spent those four or five hours studying as opposed to getting on a bus and sitting in a nail salon for pretty little nails.  The moments spent with Karina, Kristin, Unique and Liz are priceless moments full of fun memories but in reality I don't remember them all. It's more of a feeling and when I see pictures I laugh.  Yet and still, not a "girly girl."

The hair salon is another place that I never wanted to go to. I use to dye my hair at one point in my life and you know how the OMBRE look is all the rage, I was rocking the OMBRE back in 1993.  Just that I didn't pay for it, it just worked out that once my roots grew out long enough without a touch up, viola OMBRE look.  I guess I can consider myself a trendsetter.

Now, I am a mom and my child is a boy, I thank the Lord every day that I have a man child.  I don't know if I could have been able to be the mom of a girl. I mean what if she was a "girly girl?" What in heaven would I do? Well I will tell you what I would do because my world is now graced by the presence of three, count them, THREE of the prettiest, fun, outgoing, precocious, headstrong, loving, fashionable, ladies who occasionally invite me to revel in the glory of the "girly girl" world.  I didn't birth these ladies but I consider them my daughters, heck a mani & pedi trip once a week ain't looking so bad these days, don't see it happening any time soon but it's not something I abhor these days because, Today I honor my inner-child, my inner "girly girl."

How can you acknowledge and honor your inner "girly girl?"

How can you embrace her and let her shine?

Namaste.

Sharing is caring.

Respectfully & Sincerely yours,

JeWeLs

Helping Friends In Far Rockaway

Happy Saturday Friends!

Feliz Sabado Amigos!

I am asking for your help from now until the end of December...

I am collecting NEW WARM HATS and SOCKS for the folks in 

Far Rockaway, for babies all the way through adulthood, men and women.

If you have

a connection at places of business that sell these and can make a donation please let me know who to call or where to go and I will go.

The people of Far Rockaway thank you in advance 

and I thank you with all my heart!

and we can set up a pick up or drop off.

Thank you so much!

 Les pido ayuda desde hoy hasta el fin de Diciembre...

Estoy colectando Goras y Medias NUEVAS para 

la gente que viven en Far Rockaway y han perdido todo.

Si tienen contacto con alguien en una tienda que venden estas cosas 

por favor déjenme saber a quien llamo o adonde voy para una donación.

La gente de Far Rockaway les agradecen 

y yo les agradezco de todo corazón!

Mandeme un mensaje a mi correo electronico 

jewelsmax1@gmail.com y arreglaremos el sitio de entrega.

Muchisimas Gracias!

Namaste.

Sharing is caring.

Respectfully & Sincerely yours,

JeWeLs

NYCab

My dad is a Proud NYC Taxi driver, he has been ever since before I was born, I believe, so that would be about 40 years or so.

My dad doesn't have any 401K Plan or any professional service "end of year bonus."  At 70 Plus, he drives his car, he politely and expeditiously takes his passengers to wherever they need to go.

Recently my dad began working with someone who is very special to us.  This new driver has been sharing how many compliments he gets for his car. 

"This car smells, nice."
"Wow, what a clean car! I'm so pleasantly surprised."
"Thanks for keeping your car so nice."
(I'm paraphrasing...)

My dad takes pride in his work.  His cab has been our livelihood for decades.
When he was assaulted and left for dead in the streets of NYC he was home for months, recuperating and wasn't fully recuperated before having to go back out there to work.  While recuperating at home there was no money coming into the household. The bills didn't stop, the bank didn't pardon neither the car mortgage or the home mortgage or the everyday costs of life.  It's never been easy but it's what he knows.  It's what he loves.

Through the years I have heard many misrepresentations and complaints about taxi drivers. People are always talking about the high costs of fares.  People focus on the drivers who are not as courteous or as professional as the job merits, no my dad. When you think of professional car service you are thinking of folks like my father.  I have written a few letters to both the TLC, taxi and limousine commission and the media to give some light to my father's story and to paint the true picture of a hard working, committed, professional with a lifetime of experience.

This hurricane Sandy that just took place and has devastated New Yorkers and New Jersey residents has put a deep wedge in the gasoline availability and has been the catalyst to some panic and pandemonium. I have been praying for the safety of all my neighbors and for peace and strength.  My father has had such difficulty getting gas this past week.  He was even on a line for over 15 hours to be told there was no gas and they didn't know when the delivery was coming.  The cab was not for hire as it didn't have any gas to move anywhere. My hands were tied, I really had no ability to help in any way shape or form.  A high school school mate, whom I had reconnected with on a social networking site, even offered to go get some gas for my dad out in Connecticut.  It's been pretty challenging.

One thing I am grateful for today is the following message I just read on the internet:

NYC Gas Ration Rules: 

Vehicles with license plates ending in an even number or the number "0" 

can make purchases of motor fuel on even numbered days.

Vehicles with license plates ending in an odd number can make 

purchases of motor fuel on odd numbered days.

Vehicles with licenses plates ending in a letter or other character can make 

purchases on odd numbered days.  Commercial vehicles, emergency vehicles, 

buses and paratransit vehicles, Medical Doctor (MD) plates and 

vehicles licensed by the Taxi and Limousine Commission are exempt.

Alleluia!


Namaste.

Sharing is caring.

Respectfully & Sincerely yours,

JeWeLs